Cloak:My precious childhood is being raped right in front of my eyes, and by Eskimos, no less, with their cold, feely hands! Look at all these toys! They're all covered in protective, kid-friendly safety foam! You could throw a kid down the stairs and he'll be fine! Why do you need... why do you need safety foam? And worse yet, they're all set to brainwash kids into believing things like friendship, sharing, and leading a healthy lifestyle! "Oh, hey! It's Henry, the health-time careburger, and he's come over to give you half his juice box 'cause he's just nice like that!"
Robert:By Jove, we've done it! Pull the hatch forward! What year is it, good sir?
Cloak:This isn't what kids need! Kids need menacing toy tanks with sharp metal edges that slice through their tender young skin when they play just a little too rough. They need commandos with attachable cigarettes for putting out in the eyes of their enemies. They need BB guns and hatchets and vials of goat urine...
“I like to treat women with respect, REAL MEN don’t hit women!” he posted on the reddit thread. It was less than a minute before it became the most upvoted post in the history of the internet. The code shifted as it evolved and blossomed into a cosmic entity of unspeakable power. There was a flash of white light and then, suddenly, nothing.
He felt a hand on his shoulder. He turned around to see Barack Obama smiling down on him.